I wanted to delve deeper on that horse…

Earlier this week, I mentioned values. Values are the set of behaviours that we desire. It’s what we’re seeking in life. We choose to prioritise certain things over another as a result of our values.

Do you know your values?

What are they?

What order do they come in?

If two were conflicting, which one would you choose first?

Do you know the answers to these questions?

Perhaps take some time to ponder them. Like, now 😉

(If you don’t know them, then what are you bench-marking against?)

Your first five will be the most important. Then see if you can take it ten.

Those we connect with, I mean really connect with, are those who we perceive as being ‘like’ us. Usually their values will be in alignment with ours.

Like I mentioned on Monday, even though our values may match, we may have different rules around them.  For example, if one of your values is love – how do you know love? How do you know you are loved or how do you expect to be loved?

Keep in mind, the way your friend/family/partner/lover may expect to be loved may be completely different.

Just keep that in mind.

The other thing I want to say about values is that they flavour our perception of the world. And that perception is exactly that – perception. It is not reality. And what we’ve got to be mindful of is applying our perception and thinking it’s an ABSOLUTE.

It’s not.

Your values are neither right or wrong or good or bad. And neither are another’s.

Just keep that in mind too.

When we’re searching for connection with others, we do tend to look for those who align with our values. But do we want them to align 100%? I don’t think so. Wouldn’t we want someone to challenge us? Because when we’re challenged we grow. Our ABSOLUTES may no longer be absolutes anymore.

Don’t play it safe finding someone who is in total, total alignment with you. It can create apathy and boredom. People do not like confrontation and therefore go with someone who fits snuggly into their comfort zone. There’s no magic that happens inside your comfort zone.

On the other hand, choosing someone who is completely out of alignment, who is too far the other way, can create volatility – much more then confrontation.

So, like we’ve said so many times here before, it’s about balance.

With love

Lynda

PS. If you like what I have to say or think someone else could benefit from this humble little blurb, feel free to ‘like it’ or ‘share it’